Some Guy Cooking an Egg in a Microwave

The more I think about “Kitchen Hacks,” the more annoyed I get.

Egg in a MicrowaveReally, is some guy cooking an egg in a microwave really a “Kitchen Hack?”

First, watch this:

Then, let’s talk…

First of all, I said my piece on the kitchen hack issue in that other post. At least, I think I said my piece. Secondly, I think we’re talking about productivity for the sake of internet memes here: which is precisely why I titled this post:

Some Guy Cooking an Egg in a Microwave.

Taste? Flavor? Convenience? Doing it just to be “cool?” Those are some of the reasons you might want to cook your eggs differently – like Eggs in a Muffin Tin.

As you build your Metakitchen, you might want to ask yourself why you’re doing what you’re doing. Seriously: the post above talks about presentation of the eggs, and the fact that they’re moving and wanted something quick for the family that can be put in the fridge. Awesome.

Meanwhile, there are other egg techniques out there that are just as quick, or maybe even quicker – I cooked my egg in the microwave, start to finish, including the video, in under three minutes (you don’t see me spraying the cooking spray in the bowl).

As we build out this site, we’re asking ourselves that very question: “Why are we doing this?”

Honestly, because we needed to whip up an egg for the dog and wanted to have a video on YouTube.

Ha.

On Kitchen Hacks and the Joy of Cooking

From the “we couldn’t have said it better ourselves” department, Cracked.com has broken down “8 Stupid Kitchen Hacks…” and it’s one of the more awesome things you’ll see ever on the internet. NSFW, and here’s a link to the post:¬†8 Stupid Kitchen Hacks Tested for Usefulness. But it got us thinking about a more austere, diplomatic discussion of this pressing issue. Thus, we present: On Kitchen Hacks and the Joy of Cooking.

Hack-free Barbecue

First, the Cracked post. The upshot and/or if you’re a family audience (like ours is), 7 of the 8 “hacks” aren’t time-savers and/or didn’t work. And/or they’re stupid, which, again, Cracked says much more eloquently than we shall. The only one worth a darn, at least according to the article, is this one.

We wholeheartedly agree: that is one awesome kitchen hack. 3-million-plus views on YouTube can’t be wrong. (Or…can they?)

Does EVERYTHING need to be a “Hack?”

Webster’s Dictionary defines “Hack” as “to cough up part of one’s lung.” I made that up, it didn’t actually define it as such, but methinks thou dost hack too much.

For instance, I share the above photo of barbecue because my youngest and I concocted our own barbecue sauce. Or was it a barbecue sauce hack? We took regular old barbecue sauce and doctored it. A little of this, a little of that. Actually…

Doctored Barbecue Sauce

Truth be told, it was quite awesome. A cup of each of the bottled sauce, (yellow) mustard, dijon, and brown sugar; two tablespoons each of hot sauce, vinegar, and honey.

The doctored sauce went on top of ribs, which were also quite awesome. They had to be par boiled first, then roasted in the oven. Sauce went on when they went in the oven. Ribs were devoured.

No hacking was involved. Doctoring, maybe, but not hacking.

On Kitchen Hacks and the Joy of Cooking

Love spending time in the kitchen? Check. Don’t mind putting in a little extra effort to make something awesome? Check.

But what if stuff has a tendency to go bad: like the potatoes sprouting eyes, or the onions (or garlic) sitting on the counter growing new sprouts of onion (or garlic)? What if I’d rather use garlic out of the jar? Does that make me a bad chef?

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Really…it’s enough to really get super-confused. Am I supposed to save time, am I supposed to do it because it looks cool, am I supposed to hack my way into kitchen awesomeness?

Don’t Confuse “Hack” with “Technique”

If you saw our post on Sous Vide and Blow Torches, you probably know where we stand here: we’re all about technique. That doesn’t mean we can’t actually do a hack – after all, making your own Sous Vide “machine” out of a pot of water, a thermometer, and a Ziploc bag is technically a hack. Right? Then so is the blow torch at the end. Then…

When “slow food” became a thing a dozen or so years ago, the argument sorta got boiled down to “it’s the journey, not the destination.” So, sure, peel the garlic by shaking it vigorously between two bowls. You’re now steps closer to roasting that garlic and spreading it on toasted artisan loaves and serving with your Sous Vide Duck.

Our point – trust us, we have one – is this: maybe you don’t need to try to hack your way through everything. It’s valuable to save time in the kitchen, and it’s great to experiment, but at what cost? Just like the point of the Cracked article – maybe the point of the sandwich is that there are imperfections, where meat doesn’t meet bread, and you’re not a five-year-old.

Plus, there appear to be about a thousand ways to boil an egg.

Enjoy the ride, people.

Will It Goo?

Metakitchen LogoSomething tells us this sort of thing could catch on. Will It Goo? Great question. Take something, boil it down, and see if it turns into goo. (Or another substance. Lava? Something crunchy? The possibilities are semi-endless.)

Longtime friend Gary Unger shared this video and asked: “Is this the kind of thing that will work for Metakitchen?”

Short answer: YES.

Here’s the video, called “Will It Goo?”

BTW, if you have a video to share, or a kitchen hack you think would be dynamite for us to put on the site, let us know! Email hack [at] metakitchen [dot] co. (Note that it’s a dot-co; we use the “m” for “yumm.”)